Relationship Issues
What are Relationship Issues?
Relationships are as unique as the individuals that have them. While no two relationships are identical, there are some common issues across relationships that prompt its members to recognize the need for and seek out help to overcome them and find more closeness. There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking help to navigate difficult issues in your relationship. In fact, having a trusted, neutral third person—in the form of a relationship counselor who is equipped to offer an outside perspective, support, and guidance—can allow for deeper and more focused relationship building and strengthening.
Relationship counseling is not only for when there is a problem; a relationship counselor can help you navigate big decisions or other changes in your lives that are positive.
What kinds of things can a relationship therapist help with?
Building or Restoring Trust
Trust is a vital component of any healthy relationship. Sometimes, we have trouble trusting others: maybe we have been let down by others in the past and find it hard to depend on another person. Or maybe trust in our current relationship has somehow been damaged. Learning to build or rebuild trust with others on our own can be difficult to do if we don’t know how, or if we have been hurt somehow.
Navigating Change
Just as we grow and change individually, a relationship changes over time. Some changes can be enormous: considering marriage, starting a family, making a big move. Unfortunately, not all change is happy and exciting; as we get older other, less happy changes can affect our lives: the passing of a loved one, loss of health, financial concerns, or the desire to end the relationship. Navigating any of these changes well can require much effort on the part of those in the relationship.
Creating and Nurturing Intimacy
Intimacy refers to both physical and emotional closeness with a partner. Like trust, intimacy is an important part of any relationship and it can sometimes be hard to know how to establish intimacy in a relationship. In other cases, especially in longer term relationships, intimacy can fade as we become comfortable in a relationship and don’t pay as much attention to connecting with a partner or partners on a physical or emotional level.
Finding Shared Values
We like to believe that our partner(s) has/have the same values as we do, but how often do we make a point to discuss our values together? Or, what if we know that we disagree strongly with our partner(s) on a specific topic? Finding values that we do share with our partner(s), and learning how to acknowledge and find space to respect differences in values, can be challenging. Sometimes, we even need guidance understanding what our own values are to begin with.
Learning How to Communicate
We all know how important good communication is to a successful relationship. But communicating well with our partner(s) can be difficult because of the very unique closeness we have with them. Learning good communication skills, so that we can adequately share our feelings and receive our partner’s/partners’ feelings, is essential for continuing to grow and deepen our relationship and care for each other.
Resolving Conflict
Conflict is an innate part of life and sometimes conflict with our partner(s) is unavoidable. Learning the skills to navigate conflicts that arise in a relationship can make a huge difference in the quality of our relationship. Rather than fighting to win, we can learn how to resolve a conflict in a way that leaves all partners feeling understood and respected. We can also learn skills to navigate our differences so that they do not become larger conflicts.
How we can help with relationship issues at City Center Psychotherapy
Understanding relationship issues and improving relationships involves self-understanding and understanding of the dynamics – or habits of interacting – that you and your partner(s) engage in. We’re here to help you discover these, improve communication, understand your relational needs and preferences and those of your partner(s). We use tailored supportive psychotherapeutic techniques and CBT and ACT exercises to build and maintain loving, intimate relationships.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
As a skills-based mode of therapy, CBT is a fantastic option for building the types of skills essential to healthy relationships.
CBT therapists work with clients to identify and address how the clients’ thoughts and behaviors interact to create certain (often negative) feelings. With a therapist, you and your partner(s) will work to recognize how negative thought patterns influence your feelings. By recognizing and changing negative thought patterns, as well as changing behaviors that lead to the worsening of negative feelings, CBT can help you better manage relationship issues. Psychoeducation about why negative feelings occur and exercises also support positive outcomes for clients.
Supportive Psychotherapy
Supportive psychotherapy describes a therapist’s attempt to help clients dealing with extreme emotional distress and other problems. The approach is different from more skills-based treatments, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, in that it includes advising the clients, providing comfort, encouragement, and reassurance, and a sympathetic ear. In this way, the therapist provides an emotional outlet the clients need as well as the chance for each individual to be themself.
This type of therapy may also include an psychoeducational component, with the therapist informing the clients about their issues and about how to manage it and cope with those issues.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
ACT (pronounced like the word “act”) relies on a term called “psychological flexibility”, which helps clients change their relationships to their thoughts, connect with the present moment, and make behavior choices that serve their values. Therapists use talk therapy and experiential exercises to identify avoidant behavior and build tolerance for sitting with pain, discomfort, and uncertainty - all of which are essential human experiences.
*Telehealth (online) therapy available.
Ready to improve your relationship?
Get in touch today to find out how our therapists can help you build stronger, closer relationships.