December 2024 | Not Having (or Doing) It All
November 27, 2024
In this society, we’re encouraged to always be pursuing more: more money, or possessions, more experiences. Wanting to have more keeps us doing more, an endless pursuit that ultimately leaves us feeling unfulfilled and dissatisfied. As we enter the holiday season, a season that can easily keep us chasing after more and more, let’s look at some ways to temper our fervor for more as a way of finding satisfaction in our lives as they are.
Do you know what you actually want?
Our desires can be fickle and easily influenced. This is why trends exist and can so easily take hold. Think about how often different cuts of jeans go in and out of fashion or why everyone’s remodeled home looks the same. How many times have you bought something just because everyone else had it? The part of each of us that seeks acceptance from our peers pays attention to and participates in trends as a way of fitting in. However, for most of us, our resources are limited and it doesn’t really serve us well to spend those resources on things we don’t actually want. Which brings us to our next point: knowing your values.
Consider your values
When we talk about values, we talk about our most deeply held beliefs. These are the opposite of trends, they are the things that are most important to us always. Perhaps you value time with your family, or prestige in your professional life, or living a life full of creativity. Your values can help you narrow your focus, to not become distracted by the parade of more. When you see your cousin at the family holiday party and he tells you about the cool new gadget he bought, rather than feel inferior because you don’t have said gadget, your values may remind you that you don’t actually care about such things.
Remember that feelings pass
Our feelings are ephemeral. Though they may be intense, they do eventually pass, and so do trends. There will always be new fashion, new gadgets, and new hot travel destinations. What stays true for us through all of those changing whims are our core values, and by focusing on our values instead of our brief wants and feelings, we are able to pursue the things in life that bring us the most meaning and happiness.